So the journey continues… like the elevator operates. I do not doubt that I have support from my friends, my family, and the SA community. However I cannot deny that this year challenged me to use myself more than any years combined. For the first time I felt like I had to grab on to the strings to make sure that the elevator lifted me higher as opposed to just pressing the button and using that force alone.
On the elevator ride this year, I had reached every stop and I still did not make it to the top. There were times when I felt like I could not hold on, when I felt like my work did not suffice, when I felt lonely, when I felt like I was of lesser value, when I felt like the ride was a waste of time. Nonetheless, the elevator ride also gave me great people to share the ride with, great moments of energy when I can work harder to lift myself up, and great lessons on how to get better. And for me that is so much more rewarding. And I still did not make it to the top.
And that’s okay.
A few years ago, if someone told me that I would be where I am today, I probably would not believe them. I do not believe that there is anything wrong with that either.
I think it is so difficult to come to terms with your own growth. When you really stop and take a look at where you are now, and think back to where you were, it is such a great feeling of pride and self awareness. I do that a lot in life, but especially more now as I work toward earning my future career.
That’s why I compare my journey to an elevator. My journey often comes with ups and downs. I finally recognize that grad school goes by so fast but so much has happened. I can still remember my first post, the way I felt when I anticipated beginning my journey as a grad student and an emerging professional. I remember how I felt after my first semester and it almost feels like I finished my first year yesterday. I remember being so full of worry with the path not being what I imagined, but this is my path – full of curves and straight lines and it was made just for me. My path moved me forward and ever upward.
In about a month, I am going to enter the second half of my #SAGrad experience, and I truly believe that I am not the same person that I was when I began sharing my journey with you all.
I feel more confident, I feel more certain. I can identify my strengths, I can also identify my limitations.
I pressed the button to get me to graduation and into my first #SAPro position, but there is not telling how the ride will go, I just know I will get there.
While this may be my last official post for the series, the journey still continues. I would like to thank the Student Affairs Collective for offering me the platform to raise my voice, share my experience, and offer perspective to those that are soon to be, current, and past student affairs graduate students.*
You’re welcome 😀 Thanks for writing an awesome series! – SAC
This post is part of the Emerging SA Pro series following 4 awesome people: Meagan, Karyn, Michael, and Alice, as they blog monthly about 1 year of their journey as either a new SA Pro or SA grad student. We are proud to help them share their stories as they break into our field.