“It is best to wait for pieces to fall into place to form the perfect picture, than it is for you to force the pieces into the picture you wanted.”

I used the quote above when I announced that I’d be attending Syracuse University for grad school a year ago.

The end of the my first year is at my reach. The semester ends at the end of April and then I have a mini semester course to take during “Maymester” (I still have to get used to that term). I cannot help but stress because I have so much to accomplish in the last few weeks of the semester. At the same time, I also cannot help but think about how far I have come since I committed to Syracuse University.

As far as academics go, I still have a long way to go, however I no longer feel overly lost when it comes to completing assignments. Last semester, I like to think that I put a lot of emphasis on understanding the content but I didn’t focus on mechanics too much, which appeared to be evident when I received my grades. This semester, I am making a conscious effort to produce work that shows that I understand what I need to explain and could convey that explanation properly. My grades have been a lot better this semester based on recognizing what I need to work on and taking in the feedback given to me so I can improve.

Upon coming to Syracuse University, I had so many worries financially: how would I be able to afford grad school? What I would do since I was not offered a GA? How would I pay rent? I knew that I put myself in that situation when I made my decision, so I knew that I would have to work as hard I possibly could to get myself out of that financial bind. I feel so good going into next year continuing as the graduate assistant of LSAMP (Louis Stokes Alliance for Minority Participation). Here I am working to support students of color as they continue to break boundaries in the fields of STEM and working under a supervisor who always challenges me to improve and develop new skills that will help me and help my students. In addition to that, I received two scholarships that will cover tuition for my final year that I wouldn’t have been received without the support systems in and out of SU.

As an emerging professional, this year has taught me that I value care and inclusion, which was definitely challenged being at SU and being one of the few people of color in my cohort. Initially, I was very worried about not having a place in my cohort or feeling disconnected altogether. Now, I feel confident enough to affirm my space, to tell my stories, and to passionately express why higher education needs to keep moving in the direction of creating spaces and communities where all voices and identities are valid and important.

As I reflect on the quote that I used last year, I wouldn’t say that the perfect picture formed. I also don’t think I needed to wait for the pieces to fall into place. I worked to find the pieces that I thought I needed. Some of the pieces fit and connected, some were unnecessary, but the picture is not yet complete. I still have another year to put together.

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This post is part of the Emerging SA Pro series following 4 awesome people: Meagan, Karyn, Michael, and Alice, as they blog monthly about 1 year of their journey as either a new SA Pro or SA grad student. We are proud to help them share their stories as they break into our field.

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